Barrtalk: Dior Sauvage and the world’s most expensive liquids

Regular readers of this column may know of my enduring penchant for men’s fragrances – or aftershaves, as we used to call them back in the day, when everything seemed to smell of either Brut or Lynx Africa [the latter I still use daily].

I have quite a collection of favourites. There’s CK One and Davidoff Cool Water, both of which can transport me straight back to my youth, alongside more recent favourites such as Burberry Hero, Molton Brown Tobacco Absolute and Armani Stronger With You. Montblanc Explorer is another cracker.

But I have to admit to having a particular weakness for the more expensive stuff. I’m a big fan of the Dior Sauvage range, particularly Sauvage Elixir.

The Elixir is expensive – usually around €170 for 60ml – but I think it is worth every cent. It is an absolute masterpiece of a scent that lasts forever, and, as far as I’m concerned, my all-time favourite.

Dior has now gone and upped the ante with Sauvage Extrait. I sprayed it once in a shop in Derry recently and, I have to say, it smelled absolutely amazing.

I’m not yet convinced whether it is better than Elixir, simply because I’ve only tried it once, but it certainly made an impression. It also lasts forever.

At €198 for 50ml, however, it doesn't exactly make the wallet smell of roses. Do the maths and Dior Sauvage Extrait works out at a jaw-dropping €3,960 per litre.

That seemed completely bonkers to me. So I assumed it must surely be one of the most expensive liquids in the world. Wrong. Very, very wrong.

It turns out my €4,000-a-litre Sauvage Extrait is practically bargain-basement stuff when compared with some of the liquids on earth.

Take scorpion venom, which I must concede, I’ve never considered until now. Depending on the estimate, scorpion venom can cost up to $39 million per US gallon. Converted to litres and euro, that's roughly €8.9 million per litre.

And I thought I was extravagant! €8.9 million makes my Extrait seem like the bargain of the century.

Scorpion venom is collected drop by drop and contains compounds being investigated for potential medical uses, including treatments for cancer and autoimmune diseases – and it’s extremely difficult to extract, drop by drop, hence the price.

Next comes king cobra snake venom, estimated at around €34,800 per litre.

It is being studied for medical applications, including chronic pain, while compounds such as ohanin could potentially have future pharmaceutical uses.

Then we have horseshoe crab blood, at approximately €13,600 per litre. And this is genuinely fascinating.

The crab blood is blue because of its copper-based chemistry, and its unusual clotting properties make it extremely valuable in medicine, where it is used to detect bacterial contamination in vaccines, injectable medicines and other pharmaceutical products.

Insulin is another extraordinarily valuable medical liquid. The figure given in some comparisons works out at roughly €3,000 per litre, although estimates vary considerably, with some sources putting the equivalent cost as high as around €22,700 per litre.

Chanel No. 5 works out at around €5,900 per litre. Suddenly my Dior doesn't seem quite so extravagant.

Although I suspect nobody has ever described printer ink as luxurious. Yet printer ink can fetch approximately €2,700 per litre.

That makes it one of the great financial scams of modern life. You can buy a printer for €50 and then discover that refilling it would require you to remortgage the house.

Finally, there is human blood, which works out at roughly €340 per litre when the costs associated with collection, testing, processing and storage are all taken into account.

And then there is Coca-Cola, Barrtalk’s favourite ever drink, which is generally around €1.25 a litre here in Moville.

And water? Turn on the tap. It’s free.

U2 get a well-deserved commemorative coin

I’ve loved U2 for almost as long as I can remember – or, more accurately, since I was in fifth class under the watchful eye of principal Seamus McTague in the Boys’ School in Moville in the mid-1980s.

I first saw them live at the old Lansdowne Road in 1997 and have seen them multiple times since then.

So you can imagine my delight at hearing that the Dublin Fab Four are finally getting their own commemorative €2 coin later this month.

The official U2 coin, marking 50 years since the band formed in 1976, will be unveiled on September 25. And about time too, I say.

I know there are plenty of people who will nominate some more niche – or, indeed, deceased – Irish acts as the greatest Irish band of all time.

But for me, it’s U2 hands down. [And with Fontaines D.C. now charging up the inside rail, there’s certainly some competition for the crown].

Still, Bono, The Edge, Adam Clayton and Larry Mullen Jr. have given us some of the greatest anthems of the past four decades – Where the Streets Have No Name, With or Without You, Pride, One, Beautiful Day, Sunday Bloody Sunday, I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For, Mysterious Ways and the Unforgettable Fire, to name but a few.

And then there’s Achtung Baby. For me, it’s one of a tiny handful of perfect albums ever made.

Sometimes I reckon U2 are more appreciated in Mexico, Australia or America than they are at home. Perhaps we simply can’t see the woods for the Joshua trees.

Anyway, the Central Bank says U2 were chosen because their music and live shows have “inspired generations around the world for decades”. Which is very true.

All that being said, if I’m being completely honest, there’s another commemorative coin coming out in October that I’d rather have my hands on. The new Maeve Binchy €15 coin.

Why? Because, unlike U2, it’s actually worth €15. Now that’s what I call a Beautiful Day.